It's hard to believe that it's already been two months since my mother passed away. Some days it feels like she's been gone for years and others it feels like only yesterday. I have been missing her more and more lately, mostly at night. I feel very alone most days. My husband is a wonderful man who would do anything for me, but he can't take the place of the wonderful friend that I have lost. My mom was one of my best friends. I talked to her 20 times a day every day for my entire life. And with her passing, other things in my life have changed. Someone who I used to believe was my best friend, has vanished from my life. But to be fair, she never really called to speak to me over the last 3 years anyway. She called only to talk to my mom. And now with my mom gone, she has no need to call here again. I miss having someone to call a best friend. I miss having someone trust me enough to be their best friend. But this is not about my complaints of things that are out of my control. I have my sad days and my not so sad days. Recently the sad days are eclipsing my not so sad ones though. I don't have many people that I talk to on a regular basis. The few people that I do talk to are far away from me. I miss them very much and wish I could be around them more.
I miss having my mom to bounce ideas off of when I'm going through a stressful time. I miss having her around to tell me to calm down when things aggravate me to the point of ranting. I just wish that I could get past this feeling.
